Normal Version:
THIS IS THE STORY OF A DAY WHERE THERE WAS ALL THIS BLOOD. A MAN WAS WALKING AROUND AND BLOOD STARTED COMING OUT OF HIM EVERYWHERE. THERE WAS SO MUCH BLOOD THAT IT FILLED UP AN ELEVATOR. HE WENT TO THE STORE AND THERE WAS JUST BLOOD ALL OVER THE PLACE! PEOPLE WERE SLIPPING IN IT AND THEY WERE ALL GROSSED OUT. HE TRIED TO GO SWIMMING AND ALL OF THE SHARKS WENT NUTS AND BITTENED EVERYBODY. HE GOT CHASED BY ALL THE VAMPIRES EVER. ONE TIME THE BLOOD GOT A KID AND A DOG. AT THE END OF THE DAY EVERYONE DECIDED THEY WOULD SEND HIM TO SPACE SO THAT HE WOULD STOP GETTING BLOOD EVERY WHERE. THE SCARIEST PART IS THAT THE MAN WAS YOU!!! (OR HE WAS A LADY IF YOU ARE A LADY) AND YOU FORGOT THAT THIS HAPPENED.
The Version That does not make one want to tear ones eyes out:
This a fable about a twenty four hour period in which there was a large amount of human blood.
An adult male was strolling down the street, when suddenly, he began to excrete large amounts of blood from his body. The blood stained the entire serface of the street. There was so much of said blood, that it filled up an entire elevator. He sauntered into a convenience store, where the blood made a mess of all the wares the store had to offer. People were losing friction because of the blood, and slipped over; they were disgusted by the sight of it.
The man, whom was bleeding, decided to go for a pleasant swim at a nearby public beach, but all of the nearby marine life went into a stupor at the smell of the blood, and attacked all the innocent passers-by. He bled so much, that every vampire that had ever existed, decided that they wanted a fair share of the delectable blood and attacked him for the spoils. Eventually, NASA launched a rocket with the man as its sole passenger, to send him into the airless vacuums of space, to stop the man from ruinin the landscape with his blood.
However, the most frightful part of all, is that the human male whom is bleeding, is actually yourself (or the human male was actually a human female, if you happen to be a human female), and you have forgotten that this event has occured.